Najsmješniji vicevi o muškarcima


Dobar vic uvijek je dobrodošao jer nas nasmije i popravi nam raspoloženje. Najčešće slušamo viceve o plavušama, crnkama i brinetama, suprugama i svekrvama - jednom riječju, o ženama. Vrijeme je da se i to promijeni.

Nasmijte se na račun muškaraca!


-Zašto samo 10% muškaraca odlazi u raj? Zato što bi to postao pakao kada bi ih odlazilo više.


-Kako muškarci zamišljaju predigru? Mole pola sata.


-Zašto se muškarci žene? Da ne moraju više uvlačiti stomak.


-Zašto muškarci nemaju krizu srednjih godina? Zato što zaglave u adolescenciji.


-Zašto muškarci žele oženiti djevice? Zato što ne vole kritiku.


-Kako muškarci pokazuju brigu za budućnost? Umjesto jedne, oni kupe dvije gajbe piva.


-Zašto su muškarci kao snježna oluja? Nikada ne znaš kad će doći, koliko centimetata će donijeti i koliko dugo će trajati.


-Koja je razlika između birtije i G-tačke? Muškarci birtiju nađu veoma lako...


-Šta klitoris, WC šolja i godišnjica braka imaju zajedničko? Muškarci ih uvijek promaše.


-Zašto su muškarci kao puževi? Imaju rogove, sline, vuku se... i misle da je kuća njihova.


-Zašto muškarci daju imena svom splovilu? Ne žele da neko nepoznat donosi 99% odluka umjesto njih.


-Zašto su muškarci kao delfini? Zato što se prića da su inteligentni, ali to još niko nikada nije dokazao.


-Koji je jedini način da natjeraš muža da zapamti datum godišnjice braka? Udaj se na njegov rođendan.


-Šta je muškarčeva definicija romantične večeri? Seks.


-Nije istina da žene prave budale od muškaraca. Većina njih se diči motom  "Uradi sam!".


-Zašto su baterije bolje od muškaraca? Zato što imaju barem jednu pozitivnu stranu.


-Zašto muškarac ne može biti lijep i inteligentan u isto vrijeme? Bio bi žensko.


-Kako povrijediti muškarca riječima? Pogodite ga riječnikom!


-Nemojte se zanositi da možete nešto promijeniti na muškarcu, osim ako ne nosi pelene.


-Da muškarci imaju menstruaciju, hvalisali bi se oko veličine tampona.
 
Neira Delić
 


Tagovi: MUŠKARCI , ŽENE

 
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